Bek spent years helping save lives in the Royal Australian Air Force. From deployments to aeromedical evacuations, she thrived in a world defined by purpose, precision and people who understood the pressures of the job. When a medical discharge ended her career, the sudden loss of structure and identity left her navigating a transition she hadn’t expected to face so early.
‘One of the hardest things when you are on leave for medical reasons is accepting that you need to be on leave and stopping, like literally physically stopping,’ Bek says. She had imagined a long Defence career. Instead, she found herself learning how to live without the uniform, the certainty and the five-year plan that once shaped every day.
Learning to slow down
Leaving service wasn’t simply about changing jobs. It meant understanding what life looked like without the routines and expectations that had framed her work for so many years.
Bek remembers a moment that made the emotional shift clear. When she set out to draw her old work boots last year, she pulled them from the cupboard and saw her full uniform still hanging there, ironed and ready as if the next day would be a normal day on base.
‘I had a pretty emotional response. Drawing the boots over a six-week period was very cathartic for me.’
More recently, while doing the ironing at home, her mind again drifted automatically to uniform shirts.
‘I had to stop and take a moment to feel that loss.’
For Bek, transition has not meant becoming a different person. ‘I don’t think I have a separate self,’ she says. ‘But I am now learning how to live without the job being a part of my daily life and thoughts. It’s more like learning to live with the loss of something important.’
Art has become her way of holding the memories gently.
More recently, while doing the ironing at home, her mind again drifted automatically to uniform shirts.
‘I had to stop and take a moment to feel that loss.’
For Bek, transition has not meant becoming a different person. ‘I don’t think I have a separate self,’ she says. ‘But I am now learning how to live without the job being a part of my daily life and thoughts. It’s more like learning to live with the loss of something important.’
Art has become her way of holding the memories gently.
Creativity as connection
Bek first turned to oil painting and ceramics simply as a way to steady herself. What she found was space – quiet, reflective and shared.
‘I would never have called myself a creative person but what I discovered is I actually am quite creative and it’s something I never had the opportunity to explore before.’
Working with clay and paint allowed her to be present without the pressure to talk. It also opened the door to something she realised she needed: a community that understood her service without requiring her to explain it.
Through ANVAM – the Australian National Veterans Arts Museum – Bek found that community.
‘I found that connection was really, really important for me. It validated what I was doing myself in the art space and it encouraged me to do more of it.’
This year she has been part of an arts mentoring program and is preparing for her first group exhibition. Her work explores identity, womanhood, motherhood and the realities of uniformed service.
Building a life beyond Defence
The shift into civilian life left Bek searching for connection with people who understood the upheaval of transition. Soldier On provided that foothold.
‘Since making solid connections with new friends through Soldier On, I feel more like I have a place, both here in Melbourne and within my local community,’ she says. ‘Being able to reach out to friends who are just down the road and have a cuppa gives me something back that I missed when I was working or living on base.’
These friendships make an everyday difference – the kind that often matters more than the big milestones.
Having both an art community and a veteran community around her has shaped her confidence, especially as she prepares to share her work publicly.
A new kind of festive season
This year’s Christmas looks different for Bek, in ways she is still learning to appreciate.
She and her close friend and fellow veteran Vashti, who she met through Soldier On, already catch up several times a week, often at their local F45 fitness centre run by an Army veteran.
Bek doesn’t miss being on call over Christmas, but she knows this time of year can be difficult for people who are isolated or newly adjusting to life after service.
Her own experience has shown her how powerful connection can be, especially at this time of year.
‘There is plenty of people out there who want to connect, and who do really want to help.’
Why Bek’s story matters this Christmas
Bek’s experience reflects a truth shared by many veterans: transition is not simply about employment or routine. It is about identity, connection and learning how to belong again in a world that moves differently to Defence life.
This Christmas, Soldier On is working to ensure that veterans and their families can find community, stability and support during what can be a challenging season. Your generosity helps provide social connection programs, art and wellbeing activities, community events and the networks that help veterans rebuild confidence and find their footing in civilian life.
Your support makes these connections possible – and for many veterans, they make all the difference.
