Kristy is one of the many Australians who has experienced firsthand the complex challenges that comes with a military lifestyle.
Kristy’s husband has served in the Army for over 17 years, and together, the pair have been posted to Bonegilla, Sydney, Brisbane, Canberra, and Darwin and are now happily situated in Melbourne. Interrupted friendships and careers, uncertainty and isolation, are just a few of the challenges service families face throughout their time in the military, and they are often left to deal with these unique struggles alone.
Having her husband deployed to East Timor and Afghanistan, Kristy gave birth to two of her children while he was still overseas, adding to the already incredibly stressful situation of becoming a new mother and singlehandedly adapting to a growing family.
“I felt that I lost my ability to commit to work. I struggled to connect with people, lacked confidence within myself and was sick of starting again,” says Kristy.
Challenges aplenty
A difficult posting in Darwin is what pushed Kristy to reach out to Soldier On for help.
Initially, after moving to Darwin, Kristy was moved into a house with no working toilet, a broken fridge, a washing machine, and a bed. Months after moving, and a constant barrage of housing maintenance issues later, Kristy found herself burnt-out and fatigued but still holding out hope that they could make Darwin a home.
In an attempt to involve herself within the community, Kristy volunteered in schools and sports clubs and made strong connections with the teams at The Top Ender Magazine and Billeroy House.
“Darwin is undeniably beautiful and home to some of the most stunning places in Australia. If you are lucky enough, you’ll find some gorgeous people, too”, she says.
Despite her efforts, the family was not immune from hardship. Within the first two months of their posting, Kristy’s son was robbed at knifepoint. Fights on the street were common in the area they lived in, and there was even an instance where the children found a man unconscious in the local park, being offered no help by passers-by.
“For those that have been to Darwin, you know how quickly you’ll learn how important it is to know where you can safely go and when you can go there. The values of the city definitely didn’t align with how I wanted my children to be raised. It was time for a change.”
“Our family was surviving, not thriving. We’ve been through a lot over the years, but this posting was by far the most challenging for us. All we wanted was for our next posting to be better. I wanted to see my kids settle in with a community.”
Time for change – reaching out to Soldier On
Eventually, a new opportunity popped up, and the family found out they were heading to Melbourne. Struggling to keep her head above water with the weight of the posting on her shoulders, Kristy decided to reach out for help.
At Billeroy House, Kristy met with Soldier On and Mates4Mates. Not confident in the help that could be offered, Kristy said, “Worst case scenario, I’d have wasted a phone call and some time. Best case scenario, I’d learn a bit about where we were being posted to.”
Raising four children on one wage is hard enough as it is; Kristy says, “I wanted to work. I didn’t care if I was stacking shelves. I needed to earn a wage again once we moved to Melbourne.”
Kristy was contacted by Soldier On Pathways Officer Jessica Koop and was told about the Pathways Program.
“I was really lucky to be contacted by Jess from Soldier On. She really listened to me and gave me back all of the confidence I had lost along the way.”
Match to a meaningful career.
“Jess let me know that Soldier On could help with my resume and connected me to further education courses that I could complete free of charge. Despite my doubts, Soldier On matched me to a meaningful career rather than just a job.”
Kristy landed a school-hours role working as the Simpson Barracks Community Support Coordinator. It was important that Kristy could find a job where she could balance being a mother of four while still being able to work. Her new role has also provided her with a career where she is able to not only utilise her lived experiences and help other Defence families who may have been in similar situations but can also give back to the Defence community.
“Soldier On was a blessing to our family of six. They gave my children and me opportunities to connect with our community and make Melbourne a home. We’ve never had to pay for anything and are always greeted with a smile.”
“If you are in Melbourne, all of us at Simpson Barracks will happily be your Melbourne Defence family. We will celebrate, listen and help you where we can. We’ll be the concerned parent and do everything a family would. Connection is important, and you don’t need to do this alone.”
